Outdoor Gatherers Gifts

"Nice family you’ve got there. Too bad if anything were to happen to them."

The most fabulous Gran in the world.

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

Santa in the Sky: Happy Holidays!

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

Beginning Yarder.

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

'Hunting and gathering doesn't sound very interesting, so I have decided to become a consultant.'

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

You'll be the centre of attention for a job well done!

Midwest Winter Items.

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

'I'm sorry, but I don't know anything about external combustion engines.'

Barbecue

Dick's hobby of collecting manhole covers kept him out of trouble... except of the hernias.

Saying Grace.

Grocery Shopping

Couple with lots of kids. Woman says: 'This is our daughter, my son from my first marriage, John's daughter from his second marriage, and I've no idea who the one on the end is.'

"When you grow up would you rather be a Hunter or Gatherer?"

'And now we come to the sore losers...'

"Oh, its just a fun fur that my husband got me."

Scotland Yard - coal heavers singing in a public house

Counting Blessings

'I don't like to complain, Evelyn, but aren't these family reunions getting out of hand?'

"So, Ben, what do you want to be when you stop sponging off your parents?"

'We've been tailgating so long, I think we might be homeless.'

"I heard you had a little problem with the law."

Coventry Carol

"Oh, now I remember you. You live in that big shoe on the corner."

Tia Carmen returns home on Christmas.

"Back from hunting with nothing again?"

'Not ANOTHER pub boarded up!'

"But part of me hopes there never is an Armageddon."

look dear... I bought two farmers

Jewish Picnicking