Outdoor Chores Survivor Gifts

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

"I'd like a week off without any business related e-mail on my home computer."

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

Yardless: Please help

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

"You see, honey, no lousy coronavirus is gonna get to us way out here."

"We're a bit understaffed today, could you be 6 people?"

Running out of Gas.

"For years after Vietnam, I woke up screaming about the cold weather in Toronto."

"Before someone says anything, yes, it was a long winter."

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

The World's best Camouflage Store.

Desert island has bottle bank and paper bank. Castaway sees message in bottle float towards island.

A plunger in an outhouse

'Hey, Mom, you have a farmer's tan.'

"Help me! I'm trapped. In a dead end job."

'That's great, Bob, but I was just going to ask if you wanted anything from the deli next door.'

"Did you forget to tell anyone to water the garden while we were away?"

"But....but....isn't that a puff of cloud I see approaching?"

"Leave your weekends open. I'll be dropping a lot more of these."

"I don't care if your ears are freezing. Get those covers off!"

"Judging by the survival gear, fishing pole and grill, I'm guessing he's an outdoor cat."

'P.S. When finding this message please be sure to dispose of the bottle in a bona fide bottle bank.'

"Nothing better than a cosy brazer on a grim, wintry wind-blasted mountain top guard post."

'I'll swear you've been willing that cloudburst on us . . !'

HA HA

Shovel your driveway?

Shoveling Snow

"Happy?"

"I just washed and waxed it. I don't want the birds messing it up!"

Igloo outhouse.

"Boy, in the cold light of day it's really freaking cold!"

"It's going to be in the forties today, Herb... A good day to scape the driveway, shovel off the roof, take down the Christmas lights..."

You know it's a really bad winter when. . .