Organizational Evader Gifts

"Mr. Rod, my dad wants to clean the garage tomorrow...and he needs me to pack boxes and haul tons of stuff. It'll probably take all day!"

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"I never accomplish the impossible, if I did it would become an expectation."

'No, but thanks for asking,'

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"If I've got to work for a tyrant . . . I may as well work for myself."

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

'On to the office again?' - 'No, my pro.'

Elevator/Open Range

"Let me guess. You had it up to here with the world of business, so you packed it all in and started your own winery."

"When I said you could have a summer vacation I didn't mean the whole summer."

"I wanted a balloon puppy, not a balloon vision of my sad corporate future."

'My philosophy is to sit down and the hell with being counted.'

For workers who are in need of a discreet spot to catch some Z's comes Napquest.

Senior executive holding guitar hitchiking on open road in desert landscape.

'Yes, I'm home early. We had a school fire drill, so naturally I sought the safety of our house.'

There's so many things I should be doing that when I procrastinate, I'm multitasking.

'A Mr Ritzwell to see you, sir. Are you in, or are you using the escape tunnel?'

"Nope. I came here to relax and not check my messages."

'What's the point of having a luxury car if you put it in the garage at night?'

Hi, dear, I'm working from work today.

Bob learned to redirect his pent-up fury. Rather than postal, he went coastal.

"He's not good with change!"

"Sorry I'm late, but I was somewhere else."

'I'' be in the basement, Amy... below the radar.'

'Sorry Darling, I'll be late home: There's a strong head wind...'

Butterfly businessman

'Yes, I'm retired but my former coworkers keep calling to find out who they should kiss up to.'

"If that's for me, tell them I'm in a meeting."

"I got an extension.'

"Can we, just for a moment, your Honor, ignore the facts?"

"You're the first person I've met who didn't become a pastry chef after suffering a nervous breakdown in a corporate job."

Rudy, it's come to my attention you've spilled 348 gallons of coffee and tea. What? I did not! I'm talking over the course of the last 16 years. Don't bother denying it, every time you've spilled a drop, Gunther measured it. Gunther? Who's Gunther? That's what I named him. He came here on a low-skilled work visa. He's been working under the floorboards ever since it expired. Very bad man.

"Stop it. You're gonna make homework come out of my nose."

If we were at work we'd be at lunch now.