Nutrition Snark Gifts

'One cliff is as good as another.'

"Where do we put Desserts?"

"Our Summer Citrus IPA contains your full daily requirement of fruit and fiber."

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

"Winter is coming, and there will be months without much sunshine, so it's important that you take your vitamin D supplement Darling..."

Good Cop/Bad Cholesterol

"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

"That's it young man. . . No more energy drinks for you!"

All Natural Nothing

'Good news. Your cholesterol has stayed the same, but the research findings have changed.'

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

"Well, son. . . here your dad makes the famous 'fresh from nature' food!"

Hey, how was space? Fine. Jeez. The adolescent astronaut.

'Diet considerations.'

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

'Cut down on sodium? I'm taking that with a pinch of salt.'

"Here's to wellness—women's wellness!"

Dieting Motivation.

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

'All tests point to the same conclusion: it is indeed a big banana.'

"Give me your metabolism! Now!"

Health Nut with a 60-Pack

You are what you eat (Nuts).

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

For every Covid-19 death there are 2.5 deaths resulting from dietary risks.

"They have oat fiber, wheat fiber, and rice fiber, but no moral fiber."

"Here we go again, every 30,000 years or so this Paleo diet becomes a fad."