Nickname Connoisseur Gifts

'Hey, nice to finally meet you Vickie. . . Let me guess. . . You don't like being called 'Vickie'.'

Reading my Critics

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

"Your usually vicious sarcasm is weak. Go pump some irony."

The Family Joules: Part 21

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

'I'm also fluent in Geek.'

Math Camp. I should have read the brochure more carefully before I signed up -- It says "Go on an add-venture and have sum fun"!

Men gossiping

The writers group met every Tuesday for support and fellowship.

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Twenty Seven

"Don't worry your majesty, they can't see you, this is a one way mirror."

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

Malcolm Sargent

"I guess when your husband dies you'll really understand what they mean by a statistical death."

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

'Why do they call these conventions when everyone here is so unconventional?'

The Family Joules: Part 3

I think my work ethic needs some work. Not to mention some ethics.

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

Inaction Figure

Counselor. It's annoying that he always has to have the second-to-last word

"I thought he was into fitness, but his 'fitness tracker' turned out to be a flea and tick collar."

Pisa Hut.

S**t Threw a Goose

'The first cocktail.'

"Shouldn't there be some sort of pecking order around here?"

Man frozen in portrait pose.

"Dr. Livingstone will see you now."

"Nope! He'd never set eyes on a water cooler in all his years in the office!"

Litteratti K9s.

Atomic Bear: Part 5

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."