Nhl Season Opening Gifts

NHL, new season!

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

Perils of the double play.

Kenny Dalglish

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

Hockey Season.

'Let me guess...you're a knights supporter?'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

I like what I'm seein' out there. This could be our year Wikowski.

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

The Leafs win the Cup!

The Hockey World

"Lord Stanley's Cup...and Bailey"

Jocko, a man for all sports' seasons.

'You can't beat the excitement of a new county season.'

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'He migrates through every year about this time. Just sits there and watches. We leave him alone and he leaves us alone...'

Zdeno Chara

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

"I'd say your pride trumps mine!!!" "Me, too!!!"

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

'We're in a fantasy team owners' league, we locked out our players and came here to yuck it up.'

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

NFL linebackers are identified in early infancy and sent away to the secret academy until puberty.

'We're in a hurry.'

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

'Don't mind him, he gets that way every Opening Day when I tell him he can't have a gun.'

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

'I'm the new kid on the team. Where's my signing bonus?'

'I pulled something playing soccer.'