Nfl Season Opening Gifts

"On the plus side, concussions are way down."

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

'Just how big of a tailgate party are you expecting to have?'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Perils of the double play.

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

'We went generic. The players' salaries are affordable.'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

I like what I'm seein' out there. This could be our year Wikowski.

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

'Let me guess...you're a knights supporter?'

Input From The Front Office

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

Man transplants plant in his garden.

'Champions league'

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

'You can't beat the excitement of a new county season.'

"Whaddaya say we head home and curl up in front of a nice warm football game?"

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

Jocko, a man for all sports' seasons.

What is it with football and this drinking culture?

"Remember—we're not Eagles fans or Patriots fans. We're Tom Brady Somehow Gets Humiliated fans."

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

'That's a personal foul, roughing the passer!'

Snowman Football Fan.

"I'd say your pride trumps mine!!!" "Me, too!!!"