Newspaper Fetcher Gifts

"The next time you teach Rex to fetch the paper, make sure it's just our paper!"

'That was fun!'

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'I don't know what he gets up to in there, but it keeps him busy.' (Noises are recorded, man reads paper, has beer.)

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

"The car is in the garage, but I had to drive over the lawnmower."

"It's me. I'm calling in sick of it."

Why would birdie need newspaper?

Reading the sports pages.

Rhinoceros Is Most Intelligent Ungulate

"Well, I think we come back as newspapers." "You're nuts."

'Fergie quits - chewing gum sales hit all time low!'

"I've seen a tulip before."

'Georgy Porgy kiss 'n' tell story.'

'Scientists say that crosswords activate brain...'

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

'I'm in the den, mom, reading the newspaper for my social studies class.'

Cleaner dusting under man's toupee.

Dog bringing paper and paper boy.

"Yes dear, I know lots of people have a second honeymoon. But we only got back from our first one last week."

'Let me at it! Let me see!!'

'He's great, he can even fetch the paper. Off the neighbour's step.'

Bird in a chair with a human in a cage.

'No, I am not finished with the comics section, now give me back my glasses!'

"How awful! - was he a band, or an orchestra conductor?"

Paper Boy

"Just when I think things couldn’t get any worse, they replace The Lockhorns with Doonesbury!"

When Dogs Appear To Be Thinking.

"Are those my slippers?!"

"Percy Shattock, Page Three Girls...1979 to 1986."

Home Business - Newspaper Ad.

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

"It all starts with them having you fetch their slippers."

"Yes, we still love print, don't we?"