Newsletter Nerd Gifts

"Frankly, the 'Beehive News' is boring: It's all about work, work, work..."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

WiFi Signals

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

The Age of Reptiles. . .

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

My other cello is a Stradivari

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

Fear of news.

Pregnant Panda at Edinburgh Zoo: 'Congratulations, Wilkinshaw...'

The real reason why flamingos are pink

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

"I'm afraid you need knee surgery."

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

Cliff Notes

Corporate Greed.

Why giraffes hate winter

All-Purpose Obamatoon

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"I'd love to go out with you. Do I have to have time to change."

'Yes you have to work Earth Day.'

'DNA...nature's bar code.'

The birth of junk mail.

'That's far enough for the first trip -- gather some soil samples and initiate re-entry procedures.'

"So, what are you doing after whale-watching season?"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

"You're right, I can totally see my lung."

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

'One of the good things about being a dung beetle is that my kids are not fussy eaters...'

Beware of the Legislation

American Venn diagram

Pickle

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

'Hey look I got a free newspaper with my wallchart of north sea molluscs aand DVD of elbow stretching excercises.'