Letter Nerd Gifts

The letter was captivating – mind you, by nature, most ransom notes are.

The Computer Bore

What's normal?

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

"The low-res JPEG of Dorian Gray"

WiFi Signals

The Age of Reptiles. . .

In a world where spelling doesn't count.

When Shakespeare gets up early, on the wrong side of the bed of a stranger, and in a clown suit... Later that same day, he will commence work on 'The Comedy of Errors.'"

My other cello is a Stradivari

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

'Junior's writing has improved. His letters from college pleading for more money, are froceful and flawlessly written.'

"The fourth horseman says that he will be late. He hasn't left the Old Testament yet."

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

Pregnant Panda at Edinburgh Zoo: 'Congratulations, Wilkinshaw...'

The real reason why flamingos are pink

Sign that says 'This is not a sign.'

Robot Grabber Arcade Game Machine

"Yaffle Pass Elevation 11,990 ft Continental Divide"

"I'm afraid you need knee surgery."

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

Intellectual Property

"...L...uh, M...uh Q...how come there are so many darn letters in the alphabet anyway?"

"I'd love to go out with you. Do I have to have time to change."

Why giraffes hate winter

Man sees misspelled 'Minimum Competency Testing' sign on door.

"Oh, and add a couple of intentional typos to my weekly email update...I want to appear warm and authentic!!"

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

'Yes you have to work Earth Day.'

'DNA...nature's bar code.'

'That's far enough for the first trip -- gather some soil samples and initiate re-entry procedures.'

'One of the good things about being a dung beetle is that my kids are not fussy eaters...'