Word Nerd Gifts

"I don't like large groups. I can never remember what our plural is."

"Cower before me, earthlings! Your bombs have failed, we have killed many of you, less of you remain to fight..."

'Not me. You go tell him it's misspelled.'

Man sees misspelled 'Minimum Competency Testing' sign on door.

"Hey, Gramps, is 'deathbed' one word or two?"

'I learned in school today that you can't take the Fifth Amendment on a spelling test.'

Why lawyers should never try to write their own vows.

'If there's one thing I can't stand it's nit-picking pedantry.' 'That's two things.'

How to read book.

"It's as though he understands everything I say"

"Oh, and add a couple of intentional typos to my weekly email update...I want to appear warm and authentic!!"

Irritable Vowel Syndrome

Yonder

'I think that new 'Doctor's' font is interesting, but I can't read it.'

'Do sumfink abat litracy'

'Is there a hyphen in stickup?'

"I'm sorry, Ma'am, but you'll have to put your dust jacket back on."

Oliverachy - Short-lived political system where leaders were chosen by how many olives they could fit in their mouths.

Dictionary.

'Well how do you spell it then?'

'Literacy is NOT overrated!'

'This is Dr Grumbacher, Professor Emeritus of Comparative Philology. Perhaps he could tell you the difference between an adverb and an adjective.'

"Ok clss pls trn ur pprs ovr n strt :)"

In a world where spelling doesn't count.

The Vertically Challenged Oxford Dictionary.

'Literacy is NOT overrated!'

"Audacity, noun. Unrestrained impudence. Impudence... Impudence... Impudence, adjective. Marked by impertinent disrespect. Impertinent... Impertinent..."

"Yes, it's true we have 17 words for 'snow', but only one way of saying, 'I'm really tired of hearing that same questions.'"

Correct Grammar Squad

'I wish we were just called T-Rex...'

Gangster Studying Gangster-English Dictionary

Personnel: 'First of all, there's no 'Y' in resume...'

Intellectual Property

'Apparently the locals have over 40 words for snow.'

"I sell them for Website names."