Language Nerd Gifts

'No, Miss Smith... I asked if you could roll your R's.'

Language purists bring correctness to a whole new level, forcing a name change for Ireland's most famous band.

QA

'Know what I'm saying?' - Closed-captioned for Canadians.

Fish tells lobster: 'Please stop doing that annoying quote marks thing.'

'I was an amateur 'wordsmith'. Then I turned semi-pronoun.'

"No, grandpa...LGBT is not some new kind of bacon, lettuce and tomato snadwich."

'Just because!'

Baeball Translators

"Why do they keep all these words in the dictionary? I mean, who's going to look up 'dog'?"

'What? This is still a dead language, right?'

"What does it mean? I don't understand sign language."

What's normal?

"Smarter than I!"

'Honey, I think you bought 'crassoints' by mistake.'

Spot the Mistake... Spot, of course, is barking up the wrong tree.

Free Online Quechua to English Translator...

Nudists air their differences in public.

Beware of Doug

"How do you spell 'paint'?"

'Sorry, but basically, starting a sentence without me annoyingly saying 'basically' - basicaly, is not an option for me.'

'I said 'Capistrano', you idiot.'

Exclamation Marks chasing the Question Mark.

"There are certain words and phrases that you absolutely must not use when referring to the Rugby World Cup. Words like Rugby, World and Cup."

Run up a bill.

"What's full English breakfast in Spanish?"

Pig Ignorant

"I now we always fly straight, but I was just wondering how far it would be if we drove."

"I read that every good joke needs an elephant of surprise." "No, silly, I think you mean element of surprise!"

I reserve the right to bare arms."

"So, why do they call you guys a 'murder'?"

American Toddlers vs British Toddlers

"And wot 'ave we 'ere, guv'nor?"

"The British say the word ‘privacy’ funny! The British say the word ‘privacy’ funny!"

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."