Newsletter Nerd Pillows

"Frankly, the 'Beehive News' is boring: It's all about work, work, work..."

'...Excuse me...Whoops, my fault!..Sorry!..You first...Pardon Me...Sorry...S'cuse me...Look out!...Pardon'

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

WiFi Signals

The Age of Reptiles. . .

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

My other cello is a Stradivari

Save the whales. . . Save the pandas. . . Save the planet.

Fear of news.

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

The real reason why flamingos are pink

Pregnant Panda at Edinburgh Zoo: 'Congratulations, Wilkinshaw...'

"I'm afraid you need knee surgery."

'I would love to be more energetic, but there is nothing I can do: It's a genetic condition...'

Corporate Greed.

Why giraffes hate winter

"I'd love to go out with you. Do I have to have time to change."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

'DNA...nature's bar code.'

'Yes you have to work Earth Day.'

Beware of the Legislation

'That's a quack-quack'. Ornithological conference.

The birth of junk mail.

"You're right, I can totally see my lung."

'One of the good things about being a dung beetle is that my kids are not fussy eaters...'

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

'That's far enough for the first trip -- gather some soil samples and initiate re-entry procedures.'

"So, what are you doing after whale-watching season?"

American Venn diagram

The Animal Researcher Reports...'I've been watching this herd of cattle for seven years, and to be frank, I haven't seen them do anything yet!'

'Hey look I got a free newspaper with my wallchart of north sea molluscs aand DVD of elbow stretching excercises.'

"D'you have any porn porn?"