Newsletter Navigator Gifts

'If I see one more quote from a source not wanting to be identified, I'm canning our company newsletter.'

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'The church says the Earth is flat, but I know that it is round for I have seen the shadow on the Moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.'

Teacher pointing to P,Q, on board: "OK class, which letter comes next? Redbeard, you should know this."

"I think I've figured out why we can't find the marina."

'Are we there yet?'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

"I am not asking for directions."

Newspaper suicide.

Battery Lighthouse

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

Titanic: How's my steering.

'I'm in the den, mom, reading the newspaper for my social studies class.'

"For pity's sake, George - stop tooting and ask for directions!"

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

'The landscape is continually shifting Son, so you have to learn to navigate by the Sun and the stars...'

"Yeah, I have a GPS, but I have no idea where 120 degrees longitude and 80 degrees latitude is."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

The birth of junk mail.

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

Set sail

'Captain, there's someone pissing in the hold!'

Fake News - Tabloid News - State-run News - Free Press

"You are here"

"Look lively crew, lest we be dashed upon these scrumptious shores."

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

American Venn diagram

"Your Majesty, my voyage will not only forge a new route to the spices of the East but also create over three thousand new jobs."

"According to the charts, it should be clear sailing after this."

Solemn Reference is Made to Mr Bunsby

I'm in the den mom, reading the newspaper for social studies class.