Networking Avoider Gifts

'I hate networking.'

"...Our extensive in house survey found that 82% of you think in house surveys are a waste of time."

"It's essential I go to work to avoid being with my family."

"There appears to be a direct correlation between fewer meetings and higher productivity."

"We're going to see my family. There's an extra twenty in it for you if we never get there."

'Thanks for the invitation, but I can never seem to find the energy to party...'

'Next time you feel like keeping in touch, keep in touch with somebody else.'

People who work-from-home, annual get together.

"Tarzan no want computer."

"Let's see what's going on in the world."

Nervous at a party.

'I'm going to prescribe for you to stay away from the news on TV and all social media!'

Snoozed when I should have schmoozed.

Fred gives up his MP3 Player in favor of conch shells.

"I'm not getting out of bed. What's the point? Things keep getting worse every day. Even my toothbrush depresses me... I'll just continue sleeping until the world comes to its senses." "Amen."

"Just this once, can we not talk about news or politics or money or family or relationships or children or friends or sex or religion or sports or culture or real estate or the past or the future?"

'I'd like to request flexible working to avoid my family.'

"We've been standing here talking about how to pitch to the batter for way too long, haven't we?"

After two years on zooms, Arthur was having trouble coping with face to face networking again. . .

'Wilcox! Do come in...I'm just leaving!'

2016 Policlicks

Desperate employees escape through bosses high-rise window. 'Hurry! His meeting is almost over!'

'Is he expecting you?'

"I invited a few friends over. Don’t worry – you can still be miserable."

The Occupy a Barstool Movement.

"Not having to go into the office every day has really cut back on pointless meetings..."

'You can't avoid death...You can't avoid taxes...and you can't avoid having your name on computerized mailing lists.'

Herman likes to stay in his comfort zone.

'Look, I just expect more from a muse.'

"We came early to avoid the conga line."

Hiding From Social Media

'Been coming here for years and never bumped into anyone who knows me . . . weird!'

"I envy you, not having any idea of what's going on these days."

"Basically, we have two options: #1: Do what I want or #2: Endure an excruciatingly dull presentation..."