Neighborhood Defender Gifts

"It's the Neighbourhood Watch... there's a double-glazing salesman approaching..."

'Didn't you check our blog post, mildred? We're not a knitting circle anymore. We're a neighborhood militia.'

'Mom's baking finally allowed us to diversify and greatly increase our neighborhood market share.'

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

'I'm sorry, but there's nothing in the zoning regulations covering bad taste.'

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

"Harold - We gotta come up with tag names and go over it - That's how we reclaim our block."

"Okay, if it hits the wall it's a triple, and if it goes through Mr. Baker's window, that's a home run."

Planner at work.

"Now do you believe me that your snoring wakes up the whole neighborhood?"

Bert launches his plan to increase property values: Annoyance Free Zone - No politicians, media, pundits, or mimes beyond this point.

'He's so proud - We've got the best collection of weeds in the street!'

Yesterday you lost your sheep and suddenly, today, Mary next door has a little lamb... Pretty big coincidence is all I'm sayin'.

Gentrification vs Manchester...

'Good morning, Mr. Miller. I'll cut your grass for ten dollars.'

'Er...any chance that when you've finished with the kids, the cooking and washing up you could help us develop a new waste management recovery system for the borough?'

"And, in suburban news, construction of the new, attached four-season solarium at 6870 Evercrest Drive continued amid the silent, seething envy of the neighbors."

"Good defenses make good neighbors."

'Yes...in retrospect I DO regret not protesting against the new by-pass'

Cycle Lane

Neighborhood hygiene

Keepy-uppy with the Joneses.

Suspicious Person Ban.

"The kid next door is doing a school project on heighborhood success stories and wanted to talk to you. I laughed so hard I wet my pants."

'Yeah, neighborhood crime. That's what I watch all the time 'cause our TV is broken.'

"I'm Bob and this is my wife, Sue. Don't even think about trying to get past us."

'Well, that ties up the inventory of our new neighbours' possessions.'

Rose Bowl Lawsuit

Hello, I'm in your neighborhood to raise for awareness for

Hello. I'm in your neighborhood to raise awareness for

Neighbourhood watch with mother

"Neighborhood Watch anti-violence meeting. Be there or else."

'There goes the neighborhood.'

Noah the neighbor

'We wondered if your mother might be interested in taking charge of our new neighbourhood watch scheme.'