Naval Activities Gifts

“Why do you want to join the navy lad?”

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

'Just in case there is an accident.'

COWMIKAZES

'But you're an admiral. How can you feel seasick on a waterbed?'

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Rats deserting a sinking ship

'Forget whale song, I'm giving them some death metal.'

Commonly confused homonyms: Frigate and Frigate

"A storm rages from the East - tell the men to get below and snuggle up for movie night."

'Okay who swiped my bath toys?'

On board the MS Hepatology

'It was only a joke. I never thought they's accept me.'

"My new book will be an epic novel of the sea."

Coastguard

As you like it - One way of catching fish

'A boy! Standing on a burning deck! I bet nobody did a risk assessment?'

Horatio Nelson

John Bull Devouring the French Navy

Iron clad sailors

Sailor notices a sea mine in his foot bath.

"Rising sea levels."

Desert-Island Joke 2020: "Believe us, you're better off there."

Have a very piratical Birthday

"I don't care what the owner's name is. It's bad luck."

Veteran mistakes ironclad ship for Noah's Ark

'This is your idea of converting your boat to a sailboat, a sheet? And while we're on the topic, is that one of my good sheets?'

That foggy, closed-in feeling will dissipate soon, giving you a clear view of what is ahead.

"I know your rations include two limes a day, but please don't do that with them."

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

'Nice this kite sailboat. But how do you actually land it?'

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

"These aren't barnacles. Someone stuck their gum down here."

King Neptune getting an unwanted haircut from a Speedboat propeller

"Large destroyer on the horizon, captain."