Nautical Nonsense Appreciator Gifts

Santa is rescued from a desert island that is scattered with bones and reindeer skulls.

'Cannonball!'

"Harry—Let's get brunch and day drink."

Farmer and FIsherman

"I like my vodka like I like my ships - on the rocks!"

"Shall I let them breathe."

"Aye, 'tis the elusive Moby Dick!"

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Ticket and passport, please."

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

'Keep pumping Mildred.'

"Richard was recently promoted to first mate."

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

"Sorry, Captain, but we have to let you go. You just lack leader-ship skills."

Rats leave a launching ship.

"So that's five for bailing, and three for patching. If there are no objections, the chair will now hear arguments."

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

Pirate Dives For Underwater Treasure

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

'I told you we should have unionized.'

"Quick! Hide the valuables."

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

'I think we should wake the Captain!'

"Oh. . . What shall we do with a sunken trailer?"

Rob The Grinder admires the Nobby Shropshire One

Christopher Columbus is looking at book shelf with books about self discovery.

'Thank goodness you're here!'

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

"Damn it, doesn't anybody on this ship have depth perception?"

Sailor's pipe is a ship's funnel.

"I don't need to see that... Any port in a storm will do."