Nautical Humor Appreciator Gifts

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"I like my vodka like I like my ships - on the rocks!"

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Ticket and passport, please."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Walking the Plank.

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Man painting MOM on boat

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..

'We're drifting apart.'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

'I told you we should have unionized.'

'You should never wear a green parrot with a blue suit.'

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

'That's his new trophy fishwife.'

Fish near-death experiences.

'I think we should wake the Captain!'