Nature Tamer Gifts

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

Group of explorers with a lawn mower.

Getting Rid of the Cure

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

"Lovely dovetail."

He has his own peculiar problems whether casting from the beach or from a boat.

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Education Guidance

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

Beware of the Undergrowth.

Luck is when good classroom management skills meets a day when distruptice students are absent.

'It's an emergency! The sitter wants to know where Marmaduke's doggie treats are!'

"I've got a lap dog and a laptop cat."

"Kid, I'm begging you, please stop farting."

"Of course you feel great. These things are loaded with antidepressants."

Using plant pots to reach inaccessible object

'This isn't working at ALL... maybe I should just forget the marriage counsellor scene!'

"You'll be on the road most days, but when you do come in, this will be your docking station."

"My turn."

Next Year's Postal Service Marketing Campaign.

"I haven't seen you look at your me-phone for five whole minutes. What gives?"

Veterinarian at a large animal clinic staring up at a huge beast.

Computer Time Bomb.

'He micromanages all our trades.'

"Hello? IT support? I think my hard drive is fragmented."

'On','Off', and 'Maybe' switches.

"Because we're jerks."

"I'm so relieved to have ended up down here rather than up there, I can't stand heights!"

'His name is Ralph, but he'll only come to you if you shout 'biscuit'.'

"I guess the rollout of my discovery, fire, could have gone better."

"That may not be the best option for printing out your novel."

Betsy's not too happy with Ralph's new turbo milker.

'Mommy!'

"What was it like to wonder?"