Mortuary Science Gifts

'I thought new home prices had fallen.'

The Dinner Break

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

Deaths from Coronavirus

He looks so natural lying there...

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

'He loved that dog.'

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

"We think it has something to do with your genome."

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

"David live a rich, full life, despite what his Wikipedia page says."

Covid Shield

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

Mother to son, regarding stolen cake: 'I don't need to check anything with 'the boys in forensics' I know it was you.'

Brian surgeon squeezing brains from a tube.

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

'Look mum and dad! They let me keep my appendix!' - A young book excitedly showing off his appendix to his arriving parents.

"That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again."

"It's a fairy simple procedure. We just take out the dead ones and put in two new ones."

'I'd like to leave my pacemaker to the medical institute, my artificial lung to the research center, my false teeth to the dental clinic, my dacron arteries...'

'Henry had a successful animal organ transplant - isn't that right, Henry?'

'I've been googling your condition and I'm afraid to say...I think I might have it myself.'

Alexander Fleming

'No days off, no paid overtime, no benefits...this job is killing me!'

'I'm afraid it's one of those new superbugs.'

Artificial hearts.

Radiology, Cardiology and Fertility Clinic.

Joint Ventures!

How To Make A Pigs Ear Out Of Swine Flu.

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"We'd like to run a few tests on you to work the kinks out of it."

X-RAY

'He's a conspiracy theorist - he refuses to believe that Great Aunt Mildred is really dead.'

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."