Mortgage Mystery Lovers Gifts

It's 10:00 P.M. Do you know where your bundled mortgage is?

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

Detective and child follow footprints using magnifying glasses.

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

A mummy, in police tape, chases a police officer.

Conspiracy Theory Bookstore: JFK, Princess Di, and Osama Bin Laden.

'If anybody here knows why these two should not be wed...'

"The DNA sample from the mink fibres found in the suspect's car matched the DNA sample from the mink coat found at the scene of the crime, so I'm thinking, maybe these minks were twins?"

"I can't be sure...I only got a quick look."

ESP pizza: You'll get it before you order it or it's free!

"My creative writing professor suggested that I write about what I know...from my own experience!"

"We're here, Harry."

'Amazing, Holmes! That's the eighth time in a row you've gotten the 'dud'!'

Sherlock Holmes' tax return

"Lenders are a lot more cautious about 'interest free' mortgages these days. "

'Don't you ever get tired of all the whispering?'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

'Ready?!'

'Forget my mortgage application, fill this bag with money. I've decided to make a cash offer!'

'Emotional blackmail.'

'How high can the adjustable interest rate go? Well, now, we don't want to get bogged down in a lot of technicalities, do we?'

"No one knows his identity. He just turns up, cuts your grass, then departs without leaving his name. They call him the Lawn Ranger."

The Raven - The Study at Night

'If you promise to never try to open the locked attic door, the owner will take $20,00 off!'

'I am unable to find the words to respond to that.'

"Someone's been sending me J. Crew catalogues."

'You may choose either everlasting life or whatever is behind the curtain.'

"Hmmm...this'll be a tough one..."

"I'd love to help but at the moment I'm saddled with this enormous mortgage."

"Rate your experience and you could win an Amazon gift voucher."

Why clown agents shoul never hide in the WC