Moralist Muncher Gifts

Cruncho Cereal with moral fiber.

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

The Gospel According To Jane Brody"Orange, come in. Apple, come in. Hey you, frankfurter, hold it right there."

"How's everything here? Let's start with your earliest childhood memories."

"He really isn't bad, per se, but he is kind of a jerk."

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."

'Gluten-free manna will come in the second salvo.'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

"So, while extortion, racketeering, and murder may be bad acts, they don't make you a bad person."

'No booze, no red meat, easy on the carbs...I've given up living so I can live longer.'

"I read the Tibetan Book of the Dead, but I wasn't Enlightened. . . but I did get the munchies."

"Oh, I listen to my body at meal time, but the messages aren't clear because its mouth is full!"

A worm sits in comfort as he has just eaten 4 apples by himself...

'I saw my trainer eating here, and that's good enough for me.'

"Cemetery Pie"

'We only get an hour for lunch, so your best bet is to brown-bag it.'

"Of course, he always says it's not fit for consumption. He's a foodie."

"Hang on - this one's a Malteser!!"

"I hate how we stigmatize eating by calling it a feeding frenzy."

Meditation Munchies

'I'd like the low-cal enchiladas, the low-sodium corn chips, and the diet margarita.'

Actually, it's healthier to eat smaller meals more often throughout the day.

"Animal Liberation by Peter Singer"

'Of course on this new diet, I only count the calories of the food I eat whilst other people are in the room.'

'Diet!...Diet!...Diet!...'

"So … ribs for lunch?"

Motivation

Al's Health Spa: You are what you eat.

'I'm on a diet -- I only eat illusory things.'

"Just one menu for us, please. We don't want to overeat."

Thoughtful kiddies' midnight snacks overtax my bulging slacks … The load I haul back to my shack is bigger than the one I packed.

"I'm starting my diet today."

"To truly reap the meditative benefits of lockdown baking, you have to mindfully eat it all afterwards."

'Try some -- it's 'om mani padme hummus.''