Monster Slayer Gifts

"I'm looking for something with low clearance. Something monsters won't be able to get under."

Rudy, please help me distract level 2 of my video game. Distract? I have no problem with level 1. But as soon as I get past it. I face this super-powerful monster. I can't defeat it. It's so mean, and ... oh no, here it comes! Where? No more playing or talking about video games. Go outside and do something real! I'll never make it to level 3. You'll never make it to your teens.

"Young Frankenstein"

"It's time I got a bigger sword!"

Don't tell my wife. Dragon head.

The Frankenstein snowman.

"I've diligently spent the last eight hours saving an entire colony of elves from a pack of vicious dragons and your only concern is that it is 2 am?"

Rock On

Victor Frankenstein's Dream: 'This should definitely get me extra credit in my anatomy class.'

"Hmmm...it doesn't have the same gravitas..."

'Relax Cookie. I'll call the mold monster experts!'

Dr. Frankenstein makes the battery hen

Happy Halloween!

Scared employees and manager fighting recession (dragon).

"Do you believe in Bigfoot?"

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas."

Zika: War on Mosquitoes

"Why didn't you tell me the competition was making monsters with 3-D printers at less that half the cost?"

'It's ALIVE! IT'S ALIVE! And smells delicious!'

"This time I'm sure I've got it right!"

Spooky Chemistry.

"After a long day at school, it's nice just to come home, kick back and outrun a horde of bloodthirsty zombies."

"Anything but a head shot only angers an attorney."

'Wow, this computer virus is really something else!'

Le Roi Kong

Loch Ness.

'Oh for crying out loud, so there's a spider in the bathtub!!'

'Oh, sure, I should wake him up...but I asked him to kill that thing a week ago!'

'A giant killer macrophage! Doctor, this is madness!'

'Well, there's something you don't see every day!'

How to Get Rid of All the Snow

"You idiot, I told you to get me a brain!"

Saint George's Day: 'You can understand why they made him England's Patron Saint.'

"This is what the city pays us for, DiAngelo!"

'Willy, get me the pesticide! We've got zombies!'