Modern Love Commentators Gifts

"And he's caring and honest and gentle..." "I'd do her."

'It was love at first sight, although he was very pixilated and I was out of focus'

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

"It's a legal document authorizing you to carry out a Do Not Resuscitate order on my behalf, although heaven knows, you have a hard enough time cancelling a magazine subscription."

Man in traffic jam watches couple row while eating popcorn.

"Sometime I find it hard to believe that we found each other through regular channels."

"Oh, you were on automatic pilot? And what about her? Was she on automatic pilot, too?"

'No, he didn't have any last words,his wife was in there and she did all of the talking right up to the end.'

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

'You will never require the services of a dating agency.'

'This is a simple proclamation-of-lack-of-interest date.'

"...as they may share in our joy.", "For we are all as one."

'So, did your marriage counseling work?', 'It sure did! -- She ran off with the marriage counselor!'

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'Here's a list of women I want you to stay away from at the party tonight.'

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

"Now who's being judgy?"

"Yes I know...she just needs a passport!"

"I don't see what you see in him."

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

'I'm no good at sports, so I'll just have to settle for a trophy wife.'

"Yes, it was good for me - not as good as it was the last time, but probably better than it's going to be the time after this."

Elderly spinster commenting on a marriage

"I said I was sorry. No need to bite my head off!"

"Check this out - I think the guy behind us just got lucky!"