Modern Lifestyle Lovers Pillows

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

#Whyneighborsdon'tknowtheirneighbors

"I shop, therefore I am."

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

"Hey Scout, isn't ice fishing great?"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

'Thanks for the book, dad. Now I can reach my computer!'

i-teddy

Fur Baby

"Their wedding registry has 8 place settings of double wall, stainless steel water bottles."

"Teenagers! Everyone try to look cool!"

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

"The way you look at me, Craig... you really see me."

'Apparently it downloads data to your brain.'

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"

"Hi, I'd like to add you to my professional network on LinkedIn."

"Why would I want to see anything that far away from my phone?"

'Shouldn't we be doing this online?'

"....Reception on my tablet is so much better since I added wifi to my mule..."

"I wasn't copying off others. I was just crowdsourcing the answers."

'Mom, can you tell me about the days before Pilates and Latte's?'

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

The Eternal Question

"As soon as I reconfigure the router, I'll reset my WIFI connection, download and unzip my files, and then I can start the presentation on how to simplify your life!"

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

Astronaut Selfie.

"The coffee is free, but now we rent the tables."

"Good grief, Bradbury! How long have you been working at home?"

"OK, I'll play outside, but what do I do when I get out of Wi-Fi range?"