Misanthropy Gifts

In Memory of Old Bob Who Loved This Park But Hated People

"People extra suck"

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"It's a full moon somewhere."

Neil Young

'You have clinical lycanthropy. It's a psychiatric syndrome in which a person has a delusion that they are an animal.'

"You're confusing guilt with feelings of remorse. With remorse, you don't need a lawyer."

Dinosaurs of the Palindromic Era.

'But when you decided to go into psychology didn't you REALIZE that you'd be ‘surrounded by idiots'?'

"If you're thinking of evolving, don't bother."

Picasso's Blues Period

"Cheer up. You're not as nutty as most of the whack-jobs I see."

I HATE STUFF

"Brian and I were destined to be a couple. We both hate everyone else."

Sad Songs.

"I don't like hearing happy stories."

'Misanthropology.'

'Today, I did the same thing I did yesterday, and the day before. I'm feeling so run down...'

'Ok, now I'm questioning your note-taking skills.'

"I have mess recognition. I show my messy room and my phone knows it has to be me."

'. . . You're starting an anti-social network. . .'

"How can I love my enemies when I don't even like my friends?"

Antisocial distancing

Dogs allowed. Actually, we prefer people stay out and only the dogs come in.

'We thought it fit his rather plaintive personality.'

Playing Sad Songs on the Piano.

'The time is now ripe for me to launch my great new theory. . . the world has waited long enough!'

'There's nothing on television - Do you want to have a fight?'

'Oh, not much. Same old, same old.'

'Okay, now let's spend some time discussing our differences...'

"My husband finally figured out a way to keep our relatives from visiting."

Sponsored grump, donate now: 'This isn't much of a challenge for you really, is it?'

I've had four espresso shots and a red bull. Look out post office, here comes Sadie! Post office? You're fueling up so you have the strength to endure the long lines? Ha. I'm creating the lines. I get to the counter with a stack of complicated questions, then watch the people behind me go nuts with frustration! Bwah-ha-ha-ha!!! One of the best maniacal laughs in the business.

'It's the latest thing - surgery under hypnosis.'

'Got the blues so bad...'