Misanthrope Club Member Gifts

"Harlow is unbiased politically. He hates the whole human race."

'What zip code are we in now?'

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"I can't decide which I'd rather do- make a twenty-billion-dollar bid of turn down a twenty-billion-dollar bid."

Late again.

"If you're thinking of evolving, don't bother."

I HATE STUFF

"Brian and I were destined to be a couple. We both hate everyone else."

"I'd like to be on time for school but it makes the day too long!"

"That's right, Mr. Jenkins, we rejected your membership application because you wrote your name on it..."

"I don't like hearing happy stories."

'Misanthropology.'

In Memory of Old Bob Who Loved This Park But Hated People

Dogs allowed. Actually, we prefer people stay out and only the dogs come in.

Liar's Club fish

Tom's car was a dump, but at least he recycled.

"Sorry I'm late. Heavy traffic."

'. . . You're starting an anti-social network. . .'

Antisocial distancing

"People extra suck"

"How can I love my enemies when I don't even like my friends?"

Top Hat

Jarvis Sudo: He didn't do much but he knew the right people.

"My husband finally figured out a way to keep our relatives from visiting."

'Cut it out little brother, and remember, we live in a matriarchal society: One day, I'll be in charge!'

"Fly? She's big enough to achieve altitude without taking off!"

Sponsored grump, donate now: 'This isn't much of a challenge for you really, is it?'

Procedure - A Fact.

"Idiots who kill people for a stupid religion. Greedy morons who destroy the environment, crazy war mongers...you can keep your creation. It scares me to death, man!"

Me vs everybody else

Bad sport cards

Skinheads for Eva Gabor