Midnight Scribbler Gifts

Ugh – Whenever I write down ideas in the middle of the night, they make absolutely no sense in the morning.

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

James Kelman

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

Replacement Bus Spotters.

'Anorak anoraks'.

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

"How a cartoonist's mind works #3 in a series" "Cartoons you think of during the day and draw" "Cartoons you think of in the middle of the night and forget"

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

Colin kept a notebook by his bed to write down any ideas he had during the night... "Genulph hyu donkey slapperthwaite."

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

Will Self deprecation

Now that I've written the book, could you put in a good word with the sales team's muse?

Musical Prodigy

'Honestly, I didn't mean any of those things I wrote about you in my diary last night!'

Writer’s Corner

"I decided to burn all my previous napkins and start fresh."

Anna Burns

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

'Dammit, Bubbles, we need this memoir yesterday - write, damn you!'

School of Music. If you need perseverance to be a musician, what's all this I hear about unfinished symphonies?

"I've learned to express my anger through my writing instead."

"It's the worst case of writer's block Sidney has ever had. He hasn't put a word on the page since fifth grade!"

A pen spewing letters

'I can't read a word of this essay of yours. Excellent work.'

"Careful - it's full of lies."

Kate Atkinson

"We have pills for some of that."

"It took me 4 years to finish my book!"