Nighttime Scribbler Gifts

"You wouldn't like it if I woke up and wrote things down in the middle of the night."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

'Anorak anoraks'.

Replacement Bus Spotters.

Bob woke up in a pile of notes, some scrawled so quickly that no one could decode them. He remembered nothing of the night before, except... yes, a fleeting glimpse of the writer's moon.

I'm currently working on my autobiography. Would you care to help make page 327 interesting?

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

Bird Watching with Binoculars

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

Hans Holbein

Now that I've written the book, could you put in a good word with the sales team's muse?

Will Self deprecation

Musical Prodigy

'Honestly, I didn't mean any of those things I wrote about you in my diary last night!'

How to create a brilliant cartoon

Modern Nursery Rhymes

"I decided to burn all my previous napkins and start fresh."

Anna Burns

Writer’s Corner

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

"I've learned to express my anger through my writing instead."

A pen spewing letters

'Dammit, Bubbles, we need this memoir yesterday - write, damn you!'

"It's the worst case of writer's block Sidney has ever had. He hasn't put a word on the page since fifth grade!"

That night, Rose found out that her husband was not only a sleepwalker, but also a sleepblogger.

"It took me 4 years to finish my book!"

Must be old-timers – You don't see cursive anymore.

"Careful - it's full of lies."