Midlife Miracle Makers Gifts

Pram Design for the Older Mum.

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

"I'm here for the hair."

Rock and Roll

We micro-grafted all the hairs from the back of your head to the top and now we've completely covered your bald spot.'

'Here's your chance to become a legend.'

"You want to grow a ponytail? OK...as long as it's not from hair growing out of your ears."

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

How Gary got his groove back.

Three years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadie™ show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she could deal with her midlife crisis. You should try a radical makeover. When I hit midlife, I dyed my hair, got some tattoos, and dropped 75 pounds. My husband barely recognized me when he returned from overseas. He was not happy with my "new self," so I divorced him rather than change who I'd become. It was the best decision I'd made since I cut my thieving mother out

Middle Age: When the four letter word you use most is 'What?'

Childbirth and Covid 19

Tragedy and Remedy.

"Still getting those hot flashes, Margaret?"

'But my mom says that 40 is the new 30.'

A sign hangs from the front of the Sunnyvale Nudist Camp - 'Join Today - 100% Off!'

'I hate it when teen angst becomes mid-age angst.'

"Don't worry about being in your 40's - before you know it, you'll be in your 50's!"

'Don't worry, fifty something is the new thirty something.'

How's your midlife crisis going, Al? That turned out to be a false alarm, doctor. Today after a heavy lunch I realized it's just a midriff crisis.

"I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each. I told them to pipe down."

'I thought that we would grow old gracefully together, but Bruce has to get 'pumping iron' out of his system first.'

Fables for the Middle-Aged: Goldilocks and the 3 Hairs.

Men-O-Pause Emergency Kit, contents include an inflatable trophy wife, bottle of Boca-Raw-Tan and a convincing hairpiece

"Give her a few minutes, she just realized she's reached the age when you get excited by things like air fryers."

'She's not 'pushing 40' - she's 'dragging' it!'

'We still like you and all, but ever since you came out of that cocoon. . . I don't know, man. You've changed. . . You've changed.'

'No batteries needed, but you have to be menopausal to make them work.'

"Admit it, Mary. You've been having hot flashes, again, haven't you?"

'It's his birthday. Can you play 'Another day older and deeper in debt'?'

Middle Age: When you still believe you'll feel better in the morning!

"I'm not kidding, Phil! You really ARE the poster child for middle-aged, disillusioned and down-hearted businessmen everywhere!"

This yoga class is making me take a fresh look at myself. And? � How are you feeling? Middle-aged.