Metaphor Mechanic Gifts

Poetry repairman

"Nation-building never works."

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"National Metaphor Day by the looks of it."

Electric Blanket.

Is plagiarism the same as value adding?

'...she still can't manage a decent sports metaphor.'

"See what you get for thinking outside the fishbowl!"

"This merger is not producing the expected synergies."

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

All this pressure to be the perfect storm...

Enlightened Cursing

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

"I'm the bluebird of low expectations."

'Stick and Carrot Business Incentive Consultants.'

'So push has come to shove...'

"I've been feeling a bit empty lately."

"Inside you there are two wolves..."

'Well, if I have a short circuit, just lengthen it.'

Poet becomes a puppeteer for his own hand.

'This is the eight hundred and sixty-seventh day of my captivity - How about you?'

Miss Underhill's School Of Writing Sample Lesson

Metaphors.

"My next poem is written in the shape of a woman's body."

Samuel Taylor Coleridge

'You talk in riddles!' 'I'M A POET!

Two plugged in lovers try to reach each other, and in doing so, become unplugged.

"It's true! I heard this Bedouin boy calling us "ships of the desert". What on earth is a ship?"

The corner that Spring's around

"I can't see it lasting!"

Childhood's End