Metaphor Geek Gifts

Best Metaphor?

'I used to commute. Now I transform.'

On a hot day in 1941, scientists uncovered the only known remains of the elusive nerdosaurus rex,

Archimedes statue with a lever

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

"Candy wuld be nice onice in a while."

'It finally took me thirty years, but I finally have one of every 3-D comic book ever made'

Nerd tryouts.

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

Epic Battles

"They look like pickles."

"How do I love thee….? Let me count the ways…" "I'm going to want a recount."

A knight sent to kill a dragon armed with a fly swatter

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

'Marmaduke! What did you do?!!?'

"I’ll tell ya who’s got a ‘dark side’: my cat, that’s who. You should see what she did to my Manolo Blahnik pumps!"

'A warm stethoscope? Wow! You guys really are advanced.'

The Thinker. The Listener

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

Oedipus

"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil clowns is that good clowns do nothing."

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it.

Poetry repairman

'My upper body strength is fine but I'd been neglecting my legs.'

What a lousy season - there hasn't been a good comedy in months.

Cyclopetrist's Waiting room

School of Ology.

Tokyo City Limits

A man holding a hammer watches a mummy unravel itself

'All right, buddy -- hand over all of Earth's flubber and nobody gets hurt!'

Spaceship doubling as a cauldron.

Park and Ride dilema

"Do you think there is life on other plants?"

"It seems our precious three year old hacked into the White House with his playtime computer!"