Medical Mishap Admirer Gifts

OPERATING ROOM, 'Your husband may have a little trouble sleeping for awhile -- we spilled some coffee in him.'

Barbeque Casualty.

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

'Is that guy back again? Hey, if you find that sponge I lost, give a shout.'

Cranial-Metal Plate Surgery Centre

'Under blood type, sir, could you be a little more specific than blue?'

'How the heck could we lose a $14,000 pacemaker?!'

'I'll give it back to you in a second hon, I just want to get this broccoli out of my teeth.'

"Okay...just this once...but no more practice swings!"

'No, Mr Zarynski...you've got the hospital gown on backwards.'

'I can't turn it off.'

"Not dead, nonsense! According to the computer you are dead! . . . Please don't waste anymore of out valuable time and leave the operating room!"

Woman finds something in her soup.

"Now, those pills you just took may produce some visual side effects."

"The operation was a huge success, Mr. Smith, but we're going to have to open you up again - we appear to have lost a nurse."

"See? Right there - my wedding ring."

"I'm certain you're fine, but my attorney would like to see you naked."

'How's my Surger? Call 1-600 Lawsuit.'

Lab studies suggest that a human growth pill is just around the corner.

Sling

'Ok, Ms. Feldman, it says on your chart that you were discharged yesterday.'

Paramedic Mistakes.

"I'm still worried about not finding the end of your finger."

Broken legs and broken nose in the hospital.

A little green monster

'Oops - it's not a stethoscope - it's my ipod!'

"Well... the good news is we've dealt with your ingrowing toenail..!"

'This certainly is a quick way of removing steel splinters, doctor!'

"When I yell 'CLEAR' that doesn't mean you."

'You're just going to feel a little pinch, then a horrific burning pain, your eyes will roll back into your head, you will drool uncontrollably...'

CITY HOSPITAL, 'It's all right, officer -- I'm an outpatient.'

'Try not to make this doctor nervous ? this will be his first operation.'

'We're all pretty much in agreement that this is what your doctor scribbled as your prescription.'

Dr. Mooglum made two mistakes. First, he stuck the stethoscope on the patient's forehead, and secondly, he replaced the end with a suction cup.

'He accidentally brushed his teeth with hemorrhoid-shrinking cream.'