Medical Field Fan Gifts

You've probably heard of "White Coat Syndrome," the phenomenon in which patients exhibit a high blood pressure level in a clinical setting, even though they don't in other settings. Well, you won't get away with that here.

'No, there is no such thing as generic doctors!'

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

First aid in mountains

"Tut tut. You're only having a baby, if you had my flu last week you'd know what real pain was."

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

DIY marriage counseling.

"You've got to learn to love yourself. Start by 'Friending' yourself on Facebook."

Relationship Rating: His and Hers

Dog being carried off by ducks.

Surgery Instructions.

'We need to try to regress you beyond the last seven seconds...'

"You dumb clod! Do you realize you're almost two minutes late?"

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

"Have you tried sitting in a box?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but we're not MAGICIANS!"

"With the redundancy and the divorce I'm struggling to remain Mr. Happy."

"How do you feel about turning over?"

'The therapy did help your husband find his inner child, unfortunately his inner child is called Dwayne.'

'I have an expense account, but it's a joke.'

Therapy for the cow dependent

'Dr Freud, this isn't comfortable. Why don't you sit on that chair?' 'That's not a bad idea.'

'I had three catches dropped today.' - 'Yes, but the were dropped by spectators in the stand.'

'I keep having these flashbacks.'

'I don't know what it is, doc. I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.'

"I wouldn't worry about it, in your case, the superiority complex just goes with this territory."

'I've got a good idea! Let's take everything out and start from scratch.'

Short Term Memory Loss Support Group: 'Good evening. You're probably all wondering why you just walked into this room.'

Soccer Ball - "I'm sick and tired of being kicked around all the time."

Sewing Machines in Surgery

'...And when I asked my parents if I was adopted, they said 'not yet.''

"Try taking baby steps."

"See? Right there - my wedding ring."

Flying NHS Walk-in Centre

Sling