Maternity Fashion Pillows

Pregnant woman struggling to do up her jeans.

Mothercare - " I'm going to shop till I drop."

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

"No, Justin, I said, will you come to antenatal class with me."

"This should send the midwife off in a frenzy."

So … you do a lot of yoga?

'Ever since I've started showing, my husband has affectionately called me 'Three Humps'...'

Batman's Baby

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

A pregnant woman wears a shirt that says "Baby"with an arrow pointing down, while a mother holds a baby that is an arrow pointing up.

"If I turn it up I might get out of here quicker!"

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

"He looks like you, and he isn't even born yet."

The Elephant in the Womb

"Mum's biological clock is ticking away...OOPS!...my mistake. That's indigestion."

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

How's the new one?

Maternity Unit - 'Congratulations! It's a midwife!'

"Mother and baby are doing well...Both are in a stable condition."

Clown Delivering Babies.

In the club.

"We've gone old fashioned and decided against finding out the sex of my obstetrician."

Maternity tattoos

'This is a rarity in today's world. No corporate sponsorship signs in here.'

"If we're lucky, she'll get a single wear out of this."

'And Remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'Gee, Dad, Mom's getting better at this all the time!'

'I'm on the way!'

Happy Mothers Day

'Our ultrasound equipment is not working, so we've brought in famed psychic Jennifer Armstrong to give us a vision of the fetus.'

'Well done troops: Spring is over, we can have a break now...'

"Triple whammy."

Yummy Mummy

Maternity Ward "Just call me the Secretary of Labor."