Martial Arts Humorist Gifts

'You crazy, man? He's a T'ai Chi master! -- He'll BORE you to death!'

'You crazy, man? He's a T'ai Chi master! -- He'll BORE you to death!'

Do you want to see my karate chop?

I've been teaching art history for decades. Students today ask new kinds of questions. No, I doubt a gluten-free menu option was available that evening. Nope, the artist was not making a statement about climate change. No, despite the umbrellas, this is not about sun exposure safety. Well, yes, I suppose you can say it's a selfie.

Cat in a tank...

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

Pete Sampras

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

"The Eggsorcist"

All bets are off as Round One begins in the "Dollars versus Donuts" World Championship title fight.

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"Don't worry, Miss. I'll soon get the hang of it."

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

'At ease, soldier.'

The opera - 'Please, sir, give us your ticket, if you ain;t a-goin' in again.'

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

Old Karate Master

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

The mysterious ancient stone figures of Keister Island.

"Being with you is just getting too surreal for me, Larry."

Gustav Holst

French Army knife

I'll admit I haven't been waiting all my life to meet you, but I have waited through a rough pencil sketch, the inking process and Photoshop lettering. Surely that's worth something! !?!

"It makes sense when you see the second painting with the lego."

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

'...and this is the Mess.'

'Does my bum look big in this?'

"Did you call for a Medic?"

Rugby - Interesting line-out tactics.

Jackson Pollock - "Oh no! Someone's thrown paint all over it!"

'At last! Some decent kit.'

"So, Owen tells me you guys met in art school."

Medusa's baby picture

"It's obviously an original."