Market Meltdown Survivor Gifts

We're all wearing arm bands. It's to mourn our stock losses.

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

'Normally, I would give credit where credit is due but we're in a credit crunch. Therefore, I will take all the credit for your hard work on this project.'

Sub-prime Bear

The symbol for the euro (?) depicted as the wheel of a wheelchair, symbolising the state of the currency

'Now let's proceed downstairs and see where our stock shares presently sits,'

'This app is linked to my financial advisor and provides simulated hand holding when the market is down.'

'Hi, I'm the ghost of your past, present and future stock portfolio!'

'Our fund lost millions, but the good news is our management fees are not based on performance.'

"Here, we realized it was not some awful fever dream."

'How long's he been out there?'

Tesla Shares Tanking Into Swastika

'Back in the day, you could leverage . . .'

"Phew! I'm glad this part of the ride is over..."

'He used to swear by the stock market. Now he swears at it.'

'Your investments in sub prime mortgages have become collectors items now! Aren't you excited?'

"Dow-Jones Index...Dow-Jones Index..."

'Am I glad to be back - austerity's gone mad out there!'

'My investment club had morphed into a support group.'

'Oh no! We're in negative equity.'

Economic casualties.

"Let's first talk about how you could have done worse."

Sign reading "Bought High; Sold Low."

"I think it's nice the way we divide the pain in to four equal parts."

'This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up.'

Coming out of the crisis

Make Your Portfolio BEARable.

'Our cries of Armageddon were completely ignored, so let's just keep throwing money at the economy.'

Easy street ends.

'It's safe to come out now; they're done recapping today's market.'

'If the market should go down really deep, I'll be well prepared!'

'Probably just another correctional movement...'