Marital Challenges Gifts

Silent Fight #8997

'You never take me anywhere.'

'In defense of forgetting our anniversary, I forgot we're married.'

"Have you seen my mind? My wife thinks I've lost it."

'My husband took these pills to give him some get up and go, and the next thing I knew, he got up and went.'

"So my last suggestion wasn't much help, then?"

'None for me, thanks. It might improve my mood.'

'We never go anywhere together except here.'

"He doesn't fiscally stimulate me anymore."

'We've thought about counseling, but we can't agree on a counselor.'

'Andrew, I'm breaking off our romance. Of course, that doesn't mean we can't stay married.'

'Is something wrong Kevin... we don't talk anymore!'

"I don't know how to feel. He has trysts with her, but I'm sure they're Platonic."

"I've decided to redecorate...starting with you!"

'I have been thinking, Horace, of becoming a widow.'

'Wayne, have you ever given any thought to changing completely?'

"We;re filing as married, sleeping separately."

"Looks like the honeymoon is over."

"We were so happy doc. . . but then she changed!"

"What's the matter with us? - We don't talk anymore. . ."

'Looks like he's had enough.'

'Walter, are you avoiding me?'

"Bob told me I have to choose between him and Bingo!. . . I'm sure going to miss the way he grinds his teeth every night!"

'I've got to be honest with you, Henry...there's another bureaucrat.'

"No, I'm afraid he can't come to the phone. He's just stepped away from his marriage for a couple of hours."

'Janice, our stocks are worthless, but we still have each other. As if being broke isn't bad enough...'

'Will I still be married?'

"The trouble with our relationship is too much Mahler and not enough Mozart."

"What do you mean, I'm always lounging here doing nothing? I'm hoping!"

When milk goes bad.

Prisoner

"We're only staying together for the sake of our marriage guidance counsellor."

"I never want to speak to you again, but I'm find with sex and other non-verbal activities."

'Our counselor thinks we can work it out, but my Feng Shui consultant says I should divorce him.'

"Quite frankly, I've had a gut-full of all his Shakespearean drama!"