Major Surgery Recovery Gifts

Pay Hospital Bill Here

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'I don't believe it. Five minutes after he gets the darn thing, he has an arrest!'

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

Woman in hospital has i.v. attached to plant.

'He usually doesn't follow medical advice, but when the doctor told him to learn to relax...'

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'You seem rather ungrateful Mr. Jenkins. This new drug means you'll never have hayfever again.'

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

Saline Drip Sommelier.

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

"Hey, I got you a beautiful orchid to cheer you up until it turns into just a stick protruding from dirt."

"She keeps getting a stitch in her side."

En garde!

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

"I never imagined I'd be up on my feet this soon."

'I did have a tummy-tuck...But I opted for reconstruction surgery at the same time.'

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

"These are X-Rays of your operation, and this is a selfie I took with your gall bladder."

'It will be a difficult adjustment, but it doesn't mean you can't still live a full and rewarding life, say, in the library, or even a miniature golf course.'

While you're at it, will you sew on my shirt button please?

'Despite his laser eye surgery, he still doesn't see the mess he leaves in the living room every day.'

"I just can't get over how well you look!"

"I'm sure he'll pull through. He's always been a real fighter."

"I expect a speedy recovery,"