Magazine Hoarder Gifts

"What could I do? It jumped off the newsstand."

Inserts

"He'd have hidden in the wardrobe if it wasn't full of your girlie magazines."

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'I think I'll stay in and try to catch up on my reading.'

'And the cat is due back in 2 weeks.'

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

"Not that I have the time, but I enjoy reading."

"Of course it's alien abductions! How else would you explain the, 'November Phenomenon'?"

Self-Help Books Families for Lockdown

'Yes, they were using it to clean up the graffiti!'

Bobbies library of jeans

Dictionary Sale - Now in High Definition.

"All my stuff is 'Rosebud'."

"Boy, these are really overdue!"

"Sorry, there's no toilet paper or hand sanitizer down here."

Sign on a sale bin at a bookstore that reads "Latte-Damaged Books".

"When I opened my cupboards at home they were full of junk food, when I opened my mailbox it was full of junk mail. I'm always afraid to open my portfolio balance."

Young Geeks.

'The sagaman must have had a googol of inedita.'

'Steven! Those nuts are for guests! Stop hiding them!'

"Hi honey, do we need anything for the junk drawer?"

"My father said I was too big for my britches!"

"Buckle up. We're in the midst of an unprecedented breadcrumb recession."

"I don't think you're getting the point of this exercise."

'Pay bills, stick to a budget, plan ahead.'

"They're all the books I've self published on amazon."

Man reading 'Amnesia volume 1' while having a bookshelf full of 'Amnesia Volume 1'

'Damn it! Wait your turn!'

"Hi honey, could you run by the bookstore on the way home? We're almost out of poetry."

Junk Mail.

Of course it's filled with my old skins, it's my shed.

Bad News Headlines: War in Iraq...Largest Peace Time Deficit.

"We do have a wonderful art collection, but it has taken over somewhat: We either need to have a bower or get professional help..."

'I only collect ghost-written books.'