Lovers Of Ancient History Gifts

'Barbarians at the gate? That's fine, I fully support social mobility.'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

Tourists

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

"If we only used bigger clubs we would defeat our enemies every time, and we would dominate them forever!"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

"Have you been playing dice?"

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"I've come across a rather disturbing find, Carstairs!"

Sphinx cat and mummy mouse

'It's an extinction notice.'

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

Julius is writing a memoir of his youth, but doesn't know what to call it. "Caesar's Salad Days"!

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

'I'm sure he was a great guy, but there's a new Pharaoh in town.'

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

'The dreaded Anachronisaurus strikes again!'

"Well, that certainly killed my buzz."

Trojan Hurdler.

Euripides: 'If we could be twice young and twice old, we could correct all our mistakes.'

The Fall of Gnome

'I think it's more than a coincidence that I discover fire, and my wife discovers burnt food on the same day.'

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

A child at a museum starts to pull the wrappings off a mummy.

Noah's life jacket demonstration

"When I said make it RIGHT, I meant correctly."

"Here's the parking lot."

Ten Commandments

"Darn autocorrect!"

43AD: Romans invade Britain.

'Sometimes I wish we'd never told him he was adopted.'

Hey, dad, do you think we could play something besides "catch"?

Sphinx Comes Alive

Humanities 101. I hear you're reading Greek plays in there. Yeah, it's a real Medea blitz!