Lover's Tiffs Connoisseur Gifts

The guilt trip was Amy's idea... the getting lost was Dylan's fault... apparently.

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

"OK, last time: Cado teak lounge chair from Denmark – me. Doggy bed – you."

Atlas with the earth, says: 'So then I thought, Why not just roll the damn thing?'

"I'm afraid the price would make him toss and turn all night for months!"

"Which way to the Mona Lisa? We're double-parked."

"That will be the gold standard by which all other naps are judged."

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"I suffered a stroke."

Bats with blankets.

Man frozen in portrait pose.

Who's a cutey?

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

"It says it's the vodka that's distilled twenty-nine times - they just can't seem to get it right."

Moliere

C Day Lewis.

Silly News.

Bleak House

His real name is Jasper Underwood Farthington III...but we just call him 'Stinky'.

"The show's a big hit, but a little too risque. It's not worth the aggravation we're getting from the watchdog groups."

'This advertising campagn is stupid and disgusting and it appeals to peoples' most primitive instincts. I love it.'

Charles Dickens.

'The fire seems to be drawing well.'

'It has a zip-out lining in case of a mild winter.'

'...and to commemorate 20 loyal years to the company, this gold plated sundial.'

Pizza and Related Searches.

'I know, I left the electric blanket on too long.'

All set for the big sleep, Frank? I'm getting there. I've been storing up fat for the winter. And how about Ernie? He's trying something different this year. He's got wi-fi, a game console and virtual reality googles. He's going to cybernate.

"Is there any way we could describe this bit of old tart that would make a Russian oligarch pay £2 million for it?"

Nyargh! - 'I swear I will never eat fibre again...' - 'I christen thee 'Titan'.'

"It was a typical 'His lawyer said/Her lawyer said' situation."

"Psst. . . fancy shoe sales are down. Can you make Crocs instead?"

"I've always been a gnome body."

Outer Cuteness vs. Inner Cuteness

"There's nothing like dog-walking for making new friends...."