Lover Of Beachy Humor Gifts

'Erica, you're a cutie and I really like you, but your way to do French kissing makes me nervous!'

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

Brighton Bersagliere.

'I think its being tapped.'

Mankini - One size fits all.

"Everybody out of the water! Lawyer!"

"It's my wife - she's trying to lure ships to their doom!"

'The sun lounge book of melanomas.'

Pass the SPF 20,000

Death Takes A Time-Share

'I'm afraid your conditions shows no improvement over last time, Mr. Ferguson -- you must still be doing enjoyable things.'

'I'm in hock up to my ears, I work in a dead-end job for eight bucks an hour, my wife and girlfriend are both pregnant - and you think you need help!'

'I think your pot has roasted.'

Why do men wear long short pants?

'I am wearing my bikini!'

Tsunami Selfie

"Wow, cool fangs! Are you a vampire too?"

'A working vacation, your honor?'

Dead mermaid

'POSTED! TOPLESS BATHERS ONLY BEYOND THIS POINT!'

'Last week he gave me artificial recreation.'

Just In - Untreated Sewage Blobs

EU: Legal Labelling Requirements for Meat!

"Not only are you in violation of the city nude beach ordinance....I also believe that shell is on the endangered species list."

And today's winner of a special place in Hell is...Guys who wear bikini style bathing suits to the beach...

'If it's not bothering you, I wouldn't bother having it removed.'

"PSSST! Check out THIS old bag!"

'It keeps Harold from oogling all of the bathing beauties.'

'Now remember, smile and try and wiggle 'em.' - The discarded box is labelled Falsies.

'How long have you been a life-guard Mister?'

"Have you heard about what the fiberglass in surfboards can do to you?"

'Hey kid! You wanna bury somebody in the sand?'

"What is this, bread?! No, man, we meant bread. We want your money."