Lockdown Lounger Gifts

"The Corona Diaries"

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

'What I like best about a magnum of Champagne is, it's a controlled portion.'

Blue Stockings

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

'...and talk about lazy!'

'Welcome home, Dear. Your dinner is in the popcorn bowl.'

"Writing that book was a real strain."

Unabridged Dictionary

The only creation God was truly proud of was the Sabbath

'Where does cozy end and tepid begin?'

Sick person curled up at home

"What am I doing? Just sitting here binge binging."

"I'm not sure I like your working vacations."

'We've run out of one-man plays - why not make it up with the rest of the drama group?'

"It's called 'muscle confusion'. First, I put on my workout clothes, then I confuse my muscles by not working out."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Are you walking the dog? We live on the third floor!"

Weekend paper with an index to the supplements it contains.

"Time to spring-clean where I spent the entire winter."

'I follow my doctor's orders religiously. He said for me to spend two hours a day on the tennis court.'

"As a frequent flier, you'll be entitled to stay in our airport lounge for up to a week during delays."

'Here, you can have my fly trap.I already have one.'

Floating

Rest distracted by moles.

"Hi! Are you enjoying the peace and quiet?!"

Giraffe and mouse reading books: 'All Things Great' and 'All Things Small'.

'Well played, sir.'