Legal System Admirer Gifts

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

"Let's have an instant replay of that brilliant maneuver by the defense counsel!"

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

Wal-Mart Ruling

Truth

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

Violent Crime Statistics

Lady Justice.

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"They're class action figures."

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

'If crime doesn't pay, how come there're so many criminal lawyers?'

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

Equal Justice Is An Illusion

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

"Impartiality becomes you."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

Baby's first words.

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

Ancient Greek setting. Man at desk writing on scroll says: 'Yes, they're draconian measures ??" but then, I am Draco.'

Two lawyers in a royal court

'Your honour, we find the defendent 'politically incorrect'.'

Counsel examining witness

"Do you know why I pulled you over? Do you? Do you? Yes, you do."

The Unknown Attorney: The First To Double His Billable Rate.