Legal System Aficionados Gifts

'Good morning! Lawyer, lawyers and more lawyers! Who may we sue for you!'

"Permission to treat the witness as hostile, your honor?"

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

I'm accused of kicking you in the womb, but your evidence is purely circumstantial. Lawyer baby.

Wal-Mart Ruling

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

"He'll only talk when his lawyer's present."

Violent Crime Statistics

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"They're class action figures."

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

Lady Justice.

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'