Legal Systems Aficionado Gifts

'We can skip this next case, Your Honor - the defendant has already been tried and convicted by the press.'

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

Violent Crime Statistics

"They're class action figures."

Lady Justice.

Musuem. Galileo did an experiment by dropping cannonballs from the Tower of Pisa. I wonder what he discovered? Personal injury lawsuits!

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

'I thought he was joking. I didn't think my husband would really turn me in to the FDA!'

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

Elon Musk in fly me to the moon

They Are Not Going to Take Me

'If crime doesn't pay, how come there're so many criminal lawyers?'

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

"Haven't you ever heard of the first amendment?"

It Looks Like Trumpty Dumpty Got His Wall After All.

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"Apparently, you have very little respect for our judicial system, sauntering in here with only one lawyer."

"Give a man a fish, he'll eat for a day. Teach a man to sue, and he'll eat for a lifetime."

Baby's first words.

"To be honest, I'm not sure if you marking your territory is legally binding in a boundary claim dispute."

"Overruled."