Law Aficionados Gifts

Bankruptcy Attorneys: "If you ain't broke, we can fix it."

Negligence Lawyer Stakeout

Obama and Guns Control.

'... and I sentence you to three years appearing in reality TV shows.'

"Harry, you're lying and cheating all day long - what'll ever become of you!?"

'We're adding a couple years to your sentence because you didn't send in your taxes.'

"I thought legal highs were banned now, Sarge?"

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

"Well, uh. . . I can't prove it. It's just The Law of the West."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Sorry, kid. No off-campus drinking until you're twenty-one."

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

Wal-Mart Ruling

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'Wow! I never before saw such a strenuous objection.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

Violent Crime Statistics

'You got a search warrant, sheriff?'

Ian McWit, Attorney at Law, Body by Joe's Gym, Mind by Harvard.

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

"The ignorance of the lawyer is no excuse."

Lady Justice.

"...And the court awards you twenty five thousand for the loss of faculty in your right arm."

'Remember - do not try to plant the seeds from these apples. They're intellectual property, and they're copyrighted.'

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.