Keyboard Wiz Gifts

Computer Key Office

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

I will study my speling words...

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

'You don't have to explain the software to me. I wrote it while I was in the womb.'

Multi-tasking.

'Roget it's fantastic, superb, extraordinary...where on earth did you get the idea?'

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

Piano Recital

"It's a play on words."

The Family Joules: Part 21

Hamlet's struggle with online shopping addiction. To eBay or not to eBay.

Ninedency: A budding tendency

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

'I swear by my spell checker. I have a mental block for spelling. Even 'Hooqued on Foniks' didn't help.'

Thesaurus Publishing: Out, Not here, Gone, Absent.